Last Summer I predicted that there would be no iPad 3 that Fall and that there would be no iPhone 5 - that any new iPhone would be only an incremental upgrade to the iPhone 4. I was right on both accounts and I attribute the rumours to wishful thinking by tech bloggers. Those same tech bloggers are back and this time, they’re talking TV.

Apple rumour sites seem to get so lost in the cycle of linking to one another that a cyclical, masturbatory frenzy really can’t help itself from forming. They got so lost in mystery case manufactures and feeding off one another that it was no longer “will there be an iPhone 5?” but rather “what will the iPhone 5 be like?” Teardrop shape? Oval home button? 4” display? LTE?

Jesus.

So now we’re back to rumour mode. Sensationalized by a quote in the biography of Steve Jobs that’s so factually full of holes it’s practically fiction, rumour-peddlers say Jobs “cracked” an Apple TV set before his death late 2011. There are so many reasons the Apple TV isn’t what you think it is that I’m going to list them here. Go list to Marco enumerate the reasons why this is a stupid idea. Basically, tech bloggers want there to be a TV, so they talk about it. Cue disappointment this June.

There will be, at most, an Apple TV 3 that won’t be a set, but would be an improved version of the Apple TV we see today. Maybe even apps - I’d love to write one! (See how I’m not confusing “I want this” with “this will happen”?)

What about iPad 3? More like iPad 2S, if you ask me. This is going to be a minor upgrade to the iPad 2 - the biggest change being a “retina” display.

Retina? Minor? Surely I jest.

No. You’re bringing a feature already present in two of your best-selling products to another best-selling product. That’s not revolutionary; it’s evolutionary. Hence, 2S.

What about Retina Macs? That’s more of a grey area. I can see retina displays, but I think there are limits to this. For instance, the 27” Cinema Display isn’t going to be available in Retina by the end of the year. The technology just isn’t there. A 10” screen? It’s possible, but costly. 11”? also doable. 13”? Maybe.

So we’ve got the iPad and MacBook Air lineup covered. However, this would introduce a significant schism in the product lineup, and Apple isn’t into schisms. A 17” Retina display for a MacBook Pro would be stupidly expensive so I doubt we’ll be seeing new Retina displays in anything but MacBook Air’s and iPads.

There’s even some (arguable) evidence for this rumour: @2x Retina assets in the new Messages app beta and the OS X 10.7.3 update. I’m skeptical about the implications of this “solid” evidence, but I can see Retain MacBook Air’s.